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Waves of Thoughts


University. 
Whilst it is all about specializing in a certain professional area and thus progressing in life, it actually also means starting from zero in many other aspects. 

Today's post is all dedicated to one of those: friendships. 

I know it might feel discouraging at first. You're in a new environment, surrounded by new things and people you've never seen in your life before. 

So, as an upcoming final-year student, here are my tips for meeting new people and ultimately making friends at university!


Say yes to the first invitations you receive
The first weeks of events are when most groups are formed. Not only this, but responding 'no' to invitations is, most of the time, perceived as rejection. So don't let your shyness, feelings of tiredness or beliefs that 'you'll have more opportunities like that in the future' lead you to not accept.


Learn the art of conversations
This includes introducing yourself as well as mastering small talk. Being open, asking questions and seeming genuinely interested in the conversation are the main tricks. 


Join societies and sports
You've probably heard this everywhere, but this really is for a reason! Think about it: it is way easier to start a conversation when you already know you have something in common with the person!


Seek people with similar origins
Elaborating on the last idea, it might be comforting to meet people with similar backgrounds as you: those from the same country, for instance. Note, however, that broadening your horizons by also interacting with people from different origins is a very enriching experience. For instance, I now know how to speak a bit of Croatian as well as what the typical Filipino desserts are!


Proximity principle
In Psychology, this consists of the tendency for people to like more those that they see often, even if no interaction is involved.
This is due to two factors: the human preference for familiarity and the fact that physical proximity opens the opportunity for psychological proximity (similarity).
There was even a study conducted by Festinger and colleagues (1950) that showed how university students formed their friendships, with 44% being close friends with next-to-door neighbours, 22% with those living two doors apart and only 10% with those living on opposite ends of the hall.


Flatmates and coursemates
Following on the last topic, on the other hand, proximity may also predict disliking if the initial interactions are negative. For instance, Ebbsen et al. (1976) demonstrated how both the majority of friends and disliked people lived within the same area as the study's participants.
Therefore, I want to clear any wrong beliefs you may have when it comes to flatmates and coursemates. Just because you live close by or attend the same modules, it does not mean your personalities, tastes and goals are any similar. Ultimately, it is merely a small similarity so don't be disappointed if they turn out not to live up to your expectations. 


Make the first move
Found someone who you think you'd like to be friends with? Start by smiling to see if you get a reaction. If they don't approach you, ask if you can sit next to them and start the conversation. Introduce yourself, ask where they are from and if they'd like to grab a coffee sometime. Or, start with a compliment. That's how one of my most meaningful friendships started!


Attend events
Whether accompanied or alone, get involved. Your university will always have activities going on so definitely give those a try. Many people will attend so there's an opportunity right there.


Get a job
Aim for something that involves constant interaction with people, while you're at it. Even if you choose something that does not require dealing with customers, you are most likely to have shifts with other colleagues. Either way, that's more people you meet and a chance to work on your interpersonal skills.


It's usually all about the first impressions
When it comes to the first impressions you give other people, just try to act as genuine as possible.
When it comes to what others transmit, follow your intuition and stick to it because you are probably right. When people get to a new situation, the common reaction is to act as nice as possible. Nonetheless, eventually, their true personality will come to the surface, whether for better or worse. If the later is the case, don't be afraid to let go as meaningful relationships will happen with time.


Reach out to people online
I had never thought about this before but many people have reached out to me this year via Instagram. They found my profile through hashtags and locations related to my university and messaged me asking questions concerning my experience on campus and course. I actually think this is a great idea: not just to get more info about your university but also because you meet some people straight away!


Become known
In other words, why not get a higher position and become part of your society's executive committee or your department's representatives? You will for sure meet people as your duty literally involves interacting with other students.


Final thoughts
  • Above all, be prepared for some disappointments and don't expect everyone to become a close friend. Acquaintances will be plenty, but those who you connect to on a deeper level will come with time, especially when you least expect them. 
  • Don't feel like you need to constantly socialize: it actually crucial to spend some time alone.  
  • You will feel lonely at times and that is totally fine.


I hope you've found this post helpful ♥  
Any questions you have, feel free to message me!

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I cannot believe that my time at university is coming to an end: it is so cliche to say this, but it really feels like I have only started it yesterday. 

On the other hand, I am confident to state that I have learned quite a lot, not only in academic terms but also when it comes to life experiences.

As I have been in that position, I totally understand the uncertainties and questions that those going into university might be having: after all, you are starting a new chapter of your life and you probably don't know what to expect.

I even wrote a blog post reflecting on my first term at university: you can click here to check that one out. Whilst I still fully agree with everything I wrote on that post, I have decided to share some other things that I which I knew before I started college. 

I hope that by sharing my advice and tips, whoever is starting university soon will feel more confident!


1. Don't create insanely high expectations
Before I went to university, I spent months watching youtube videos and reading blog posts featuring uni life. And although (at least in my personal case) university has been the best years of my life so far, there are also many downsides, so do not expect everything to go perfectly.


2. Don't be afraid to talk to people
Everyone's in the same situation as you so don't be shy!
However, don't be disappointed if someone doesn't show much interest or ends up not being as nice as when you first met them.


3. Say yes to new experiences
You don't have to do anything you don't want but this is the perfect time to try new things and experiment in life. Try a new dish, get out of your comfort zone, learn a new skill, participate in events organised by your uni, join a sport's team...


4. Get yourself some earplugs!
I cannot stress this e n o u g h: earplugs are lifesavers and basically the only way you will be able to sleep in peace without hearing the noise your flatmates make.


5. Don't buy appliances in advance
Either your dorm already comes with some or you will have a nice flatmate that will allow you to use theirs: either way, that means more money you're saving.


6. Control expenses
Whether in online format or paper, control what's coming in and what's going out of your account. Next step is to reduce what you can: you might be shocked by the things you're actually spending your money on!


7. Have some games for fun evenings
Whether you're going out afterwards or just want a relaxed evening in with some friends, cards and board games are a must.


8. Save and back up your work multiple times
You'd be surprised by how many times my laptop has failed me and how many scares it has given me. I even know people that have lost their almost completed essays just because their laptops decided to break out of nowhere.


9. Take a break and cry if you need to
University will feel overwhelming at times. This is a fact. Not merely when it comes to coursework and studying, but also money, relationships, housekeeping... You might feel alone, homesick or as if nothing is going the way it is 'supposed' to.
Uni life is a lot to take in and organise so do not expect yourself to manage everything perfectly. You are human and it is okay to feel and show emotion. It might feel the end of the world at some point, but remember that things will be okay.


10. Fire alarms at 4am are a surprisingly common thing
Whilst being false alarms 99.9% of the time, you are still forced to evacuate.


11. Join societies or sports
This is one of the best ways to meet people and make friends as you already have one thing in common. Also, there are societies for literally everything you could possibly imagine so there is no excuse!


12. Be responsible and careful when going out
This applies to everything: how much you drink, not leaving your drink out of sight...


13. People create the fun, not the activity
You can be going out to the worst party ever. Nevertheless, if you're going with a fun group, the night will be a blast.
Similarly, the professor makes the subject, not the other way around.


14. It is okay to change your mind
You will most likely realise you want to pursue a different path. This might mean changing modules, course or even university. If it doesn't feel right, keep in mind that you have the power to change it. For instance, in my case, my goal going into university was to study towards becoming a pedo-psychologist. Can you guess one of the modules I disliked the most? That's right: development and child psychology!


15. Don't bring your whole house with you
I have created the ultimate university packing checklist featuring only the essentials (plus some other things you might want to consider bringing) so you can click here for that.
However, the thing I want to highlight is that you are not moving into the middle of nowhere so if you need something you did not pack, just purchase it! On that same note, keep in mind that if you do want to bring multiples, two of each item is more than enough.


16. Try going out
This is the thing I regret the most: not going out during fresher's week just because I thought I wouldn't like it. Turns out, I do enjoy going out. The issue isn't having missed some parties, but rather the fact that many friendships were created during that week.
So my advice is: even if you don't like going out, do so, at least a few times in the beginning so you can meet some people!


I hope you have found this post helpful!
Remember that it might be a bit hard to adapt in the beginning but all will fall into place with time. 
Wishing you the best of luck on this new chapter of your life ♥

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Those that have gone through it will agree that moving in into your university dorm or apartment can be a dreadful and super stressful experience. 

Before I left for uni, I spent hours and hours researching what I would need in order to survive, only to discover gigantic lists of items that were anything but necessary. And because I was going to study abroad in another country, I obviously couldn't take many things with me. In fact, I ended up only bringing two suitcases, so anything else had to be bought once I got there.

Of course, what you will have to take with you will depend on your needs and what the accommodation you're moving into offers. Nevertheless, being a final year student, I have come to realise what is truly necessary. So without any further ado, here is my ultimate guide on what to take to university!


Bedroom:

  • Sheets 
  • Duvet and duvet cover
  • Pillow and pillowcase
  • Mattress protector 
  • Mattress foam topper: if the bed is uncomfortable 
  • Blanket: to snuggle up under after a long day
  • Hangers: you will only probably be given a few
  • Earplugs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  • Desk lamp: if not provided
  • Small rubbish bin: also if not provided
  • Extension lead
  • Storage units: examples include under-bed, storage bins, smaller containers...
    Tip: Get your bedding items in size double, even if your bed is a single. This is because your second or third-year houses might have double-sized beds and there is no need to have to spend extra money on new sets
    Tip: bring something homely such as pictures with friends and family or your favourite stuffed animal
    Extras (not necessary): fairy lights, decorative pillows, posters, rug, speakers, bedside table lamp, mirrors, fan


    Bathroom

    • Bath and hand towel
    • Laundry basket/ bag: something easy to carry as you'll probably have to walk to the laundrette
    • First aid kit: include medicine, painkillers, thermometer (!) and contraceptives
    • Hygiene products: toothbrush, shower gel, shampoo, pads and tampons...
      • Dry shampoo is a must!
    • Nail clippers
    • Blow dryer: also straighteners and curling irons if you use them
    • Toilet paper
    • Hand soap
    • Cleaning and laundry supplies
      • Don't forget disinfecting wipes, they're really useful
    Tip: get yourself some flipflops and maybe a shower caddy if you're sharing a bathroom


    Kitchen

    • Cutlery
    • Crockery: big and small plate, glass, mug, bowl
    • Steel water bottle
    • Travel coffee mug
    • Chopping board
    • Mixing bowl
    • Frying pan
    • Saucepan
    • Bottle opener
    • Cooking utensils: tongs, turning spatula, pasta spoon, ladle and spoon
    • Baking tray
    • Casserole dish
    • Tupperware containers
    • Kettle and toaster: if not provided
    • Dish and hand towels
    • Cleaning towel
    • Oven mitts
    • Washing up liquid and sponge
    • Cling film and tin foil
    • Bin bags
    Note: kitchens usually come equipped with smaller utensils such as microwave, kettle, rice cooker and toaster
    Tip: you could also buy some baking utensils (such as measuring jug and cupcake tray) as it makes a fun and bonding afternoon activity
    Tip: bring max two of the same item (ex.: two mugs, two plates) as you will most likely (speaking by experience) feel tempted to procrastinate when it comes to doing the washing up and thus, the more items you have, the more you will accumulate and the more you'll have to clean afterwards. If you only have a few items, you will be forced to wash them up straight away!
    Extras: blender, masher, whisk, tin opener (or buy easy to open tins), cheese grater, masher, vegetable peeler, scale,...


    Random stuff

    • Important documents: ID, passport, passport photos, national insurance number, vaccination history, uni acceptance letters, student loan letters, cv...
    • Command hooks and strips
    • Small umbrella
    • Academic items: notebooks, pens, backpack...
    • Board games and cards: for hanging out with friends
    • Headphones: lifesavers, I have never listened to as much music as I do now 
    • Electronics: laptop, chargers, adaptors, power bank...
    • Organization method: agenda, planner, bullet journal...
    • Notebook: to write memories and thoughts

    I hope you've found this post helpful. Above all, I want you to understand that you shouldn't stress too much about what to pack: you can always purchase whatever you didn't bring but have realised you need!

    I also have many exciting university-related posts coming up in the next few weeks so keep an eye for them! In addition, if you have any requests feel free to leave a comment down below or send me a message.

    I will see you next week,
    Irene xx


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    Hello hello there!

    First things first, I am already back in the UK! And to be honest, I feel like I have learned quite a lot since I first moved here one year ago. I have had so many incredible experiences and realized some things even go against common beliefs. I have thus decided that I wanted to share with you the most practical aspects of living in the UK, some tips and tricks and some misconceptions. *


    1. Everything is super expensive 

    The first wrong belief. People have this idea because touristy attractions, just as in every country, are super overpriced. Obviously, costs will depend on the area you're living in, but generally speaking, the only big expense is accommodation. Everything else is either the same price or cheaper. Yes, even food. Which brings me to my next point.


    2. Where to buy your food

    As far as supermarkets go, there are loads of options. And regardless of which one you opt for, it will be much cheaper compared to eating out. 

    Waitrose is the most expensive supermarket. Nevertheless, the quality of their products such as meat and fish is excellent.

    Tesco, Asda, Sainburry's and Morrisons are mid range, both in terms of price and product quality.

    As a student, I definitely recommend either Aldi or Lidl as, despite offering a smaller range of products, being the cheapest options. The same price will get you double the things in Aldi, compared to Tesco.

    Other than this, you also have Iceland, for frozen food, and Poundland, where you can get insane deals and purchase loads of diverse items for, yes, one pound.


    3. British people are unfriendly

    Another misconception. Since the very beginning, people have been super nice. From small talk at the supermarket or asking me where I am from or just a simple 'goodmorning' followed by a smile. One thing I'll have to admit though is that younger people are awful: you quite frequently see kids proudly smoking and being rude to others.


    4. Bank accounts

    The most well-known banks in the UK are: Barclays, HSBC, Lloyds and Santander.  I chose Lloyds as it was the most convenient option but I have zero complaints. The setting up process was super straighforward and their classic account is all I really need.


    5. You will never see the sunlight again

    As far as temperatures are concerned, hell ya, it can get really really cold. Nevertheless, in terms of raining, that is a totally different story: at least in my area, it rarely rains.

    One thing I want to highlight, however, is that temperatures in/out vary quite insanely. What I mean by this is that while outside it might be freezing cold, inside it is the actual opposite. I remember last year wearing a top at home while watching the snow fall, even with the radiators turned off.


    6. NIN and working

    NIN stands for National Insurance Number, which is required for tax purposes. You therefore need to apply for one if you're planning on getting a job. You can, however, start working before you get your number: just let your employer know that you're in the process of applying!

    In order to apply, you just have to make a simple call to arrange an interview. Do keep in mind that you can only apply once you arrive in the UK. As far as the interview goes, they are only going to ask you some basic questions so there is no need to panic! In addition, the entire application process is free.

    My university actually arranged some interviews on campus and I was lucky enough to be able to do mine then.


    7. Phone

    There are soooooo many options when it comes to phone carriers: Orange, Three, Vodafone, Giff Gaff, O2, EE, T-Mobile...

    You can check which one has the best deal at the time but it most likely will be Giff Gaff. You can choose the plan that best suits your needs but you won't be restrained by that choice as there is no contract and you can alter the goodybag every month.

    Use this link to get your FREE SIM-card and £5 credit today!


    8. Transfering money

    Because we use pounds here in the UK, the process of transfering money can be quite tricky. If you make your transfer through your bank, you will pay insanely high fees. I was, nevertheless, recommended Transferwise, a safe website in which you only pay a small fee for your money to get transfered within seconds!

    If you use this link, you can get a FREE international transfer of up to £500!


    9. Health

    There are two numbers you can call if you encounter an emergency: 999 for those that are life threatening and 111 for those that are not (basically, if you're panicking and need help).

    If you are from the EU, I truly advise that you get an EHIC (European Health Insurance Card): they are free and they give you access to free or reduced cost medical treatments.

    Once you have a permanent address, you should register with the NHS (National Health Service) in order to be assigned a GP (doctor). If you don't do so and require any assistance or treatments, worry not, as you will receive emergency treatment for 14 days. After this period, you will have to register, even if only as a temporary resident.
    My uni actually registered me: they sent me a letter with the date for my first appointment. Then, they simply wanted info concerning vaccinnes, measurements... I was even vaccinated against meningitis, as they were requiring students to do so.


    Last thoughts:

    I hope this post was helpful whether you're moving to the UK or simply want to know a bit more about what it like to live here! If you have any more questions just comment bellow or privatly message me. I am always happy to help!

    See you next week,
    Irene xx


    * Do keep in mind that I am sharing my thoughts and experience moving from a EU country and comparisons will be based on life in my home-country, Portugal.


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    Yes, everyone hates exams and dealing with exam stress. Especially when this is increased because you have to revise in a very short amount of time all you have been procrastinating throughout the year. In order to help you avoid existential crises and unwanted stress, I have some simple tips that I hope will motivate you and make your life easier: 

    Start as soon as possible
    There is no time to waste and the soon you start, the better. The hardest part is getting into a good routine but once you find a good rhythm, it will be a lot easier. Make slow changes: for instance, I have gradually both started waking up earlier and getting back into studying after spring break.

    Make a timetable
    Print a calendar, use your phone or make a dedicated spread in your bullet journal to plan out your study sessions. Leave some days blank because things usually take up more time than expected and this way, you will be able to catch up.

    Find a place to focus
    Honestly, when I stay in my room, and even if I am mentally prepared to study, I simply get distracted by every little thing and end up doing nothing. I have found that going to my university's library is ideal for me because there I can actually focus. So my advice is to find a place where you feel comfortable and constantly in the mood to work. Do you work better in calmer environments? Or do you prefer busier places such as cafés? Would you rather have a study buddy or work by yourself? These are all important things to consider.

    Use multiple resources
    Take advantage of the era you live in. Use textbooks, notes you have made, e-books, journals, sample exercises, search online for more resources,... I usually finalize topics by watching youtube videos: they are more appealing and therefore easier to memorize as well as a means of less harsh studying.

    Sleep well
    Are you a night or a morning person? Regardless, you should try to have a good night of sleep. While you are resting, your brain is reactivating and reorganizing all you have learned during the day. In fact, if you don't rest properly, you will have impaired abilities to concentrate and memorize.

    Nourish your body
    Don't forget to EAT and drink WATER. I cannot stress this enough: you might think you are doing yourself a favor by creating more time to study but in reality, you are compromising your productivity. Your brain needs to be fueled in order to have the energy to process and memorize all the information you are bombarding at it!

    Prioritize
    Not only prioritize what modules and topics you need to focus more on, but also what you do besides studying. The important thing to remember is to have a balance. However, you need to be aware that there are certain things that can wait until your exams are over. Do take some time to yourself but keep in mind your objectives. For instance, after a long day of studying, I end the night with a episode of Doctor House (such a great show!) in order to reward myself.

    Reinforce what you don't know
    It does feel amazing and rewarding when you are studying and realize you understand a concept or are capable of correctly applying a formula. However, you should also and specially put the effort into understanding what you have difficulties with. Struggling is all part of the process and with practice and dedication you will eventually manage to get through it.


    As I see my exam dates approaching I start getting so nervous since I think I won't have enough time to learn all I need to know. So, if you're dealing with exam stress, you're soooo not alone. I hope you found at least one of these tips helpful and remember:

    Try your best and don't be too harsh on yourself

    Good luck with your exams,
    Irene xx



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    Sometimes I find myself thinking about how weird it is to be at uni, especially in another country. Before I came here, I had way too many expectations, mainly due to youtube videos I kept binge watching. However, many were not even close to being true. Despite only being at the beginning of the second term of my first year, I believe to have learned quite a lot: not only in academic terms, but also personal growth wise. 


    Acquaintances and Flat Mates

    The videos I saw just kept portraying the image that you will become best friends with your flat mates/ room mates. Hopefully you will all get along, but not necessarily become very very close friends.
    You will meet tons of people thorough your degree. And similarly to flat mates, the majority will be no more than that - acquaintances. 
    True friends will come with time and they might not be the first people you meet. For me, the ones with whom I like to spend most of my time (besides my boyfriend) are colleagues I met in my course.


    Workload

    Once I saw the amazing timetable I would have for the rest of the year, I was thrilled by how much free time I would have. However, you will end up finding that you need to work hard (in most degrees and courses) and professors actually expect you to study a minimum of 30 hours per week. You will have to develop studying and time management methods in order to be able to stay on track.


    Food

    So that you can have a better idea, during the summertime holidays prior to coming to university, I went to the gym nearly everyday and was extremely careful with what I ate (maybe too much!). Nevertheless, these healthy habits were lost once I got here. I am getting back on track now but in the beginning, me and my boyfriend ate 6 packages of cookies and many many chocolates every week. The most important thing to keep in mind is that you need to find a balance because extremes are usually never good/ healthy for you.


    Students

    I expected students to be at least slightly more mature and responsible compared to high schoolers but I have not been observing this. Maybe because they are for the 'first' time without supervisors and therefore feel more free to do whatever they want? But that does not matter if they do not disturb you, just focus on you and your goals and work hard for them.

    Final Thoughts

    Ear plugs are the bestest of friends.
    Doing laundry and washing dishes are boring.
    Rooms get messy super easily (more than at home).
    No makeup and comfy clothes are the perfect go-tos. 
    Participating in class is not that horrible, even if the answer is wrong.
    Reaching out to people and starting conversations are not that hard either.



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    Hi! My name is Irene and I am a Portuguese 20 year-old who is currently living her dream of living and studying in the UK

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